Short Story Long

 Chapter 9: It’s cute, but I don’t think I could ever wear it. Pam

Pam steps through the open frame of a modern urban clothing store and looks around, noticing the distinctly vibrant clothing surrounding her. The store employees are starting to refold shelf inventory and sweep the floor, but that doesn’t stop one from making a hasty dash toward Pam as she and her friends entered, “Hello, ladies, are we looking for anything special today or just looking around?”

As she’s not entirely sure herself, Pam is glad her friend Kennedy answered for them all, “Just looking! Thanks!” 

This is Pam’s one free weekend this semester to go visit her friends back at school, and it had been Kennedy’s idea to go for a mini girls day in the mall downtown. Although she had been planning this trip for weeks, only two of Pam’s friends stayed in town for her return: Kennedy and Aubrey. Pam would be lying if she said she wasn’t disheartened by the rest of her friends’ alternative weekend plans, but she understands. Even more than that, Pam would never expect people to cancel plans or to turn down “better” hangout offers for her sake. Inside, though, it stings. 

It would also be a mistake, though, if Pam didn’t also admit that she was thrilled to have time with Kennedy and Aubrey. These were two of her spunkiest and most outgoing friends, so there’s no way this weekend would be anything but eventful. Pam needs a bit of social spunk this semester, so she was happy to go along with the mall idea when Kennedy proposed it, though she has no need or budget for anything new herself at the moment. 

“Oo! Look at this one,” exclaimed Aubrey from the other side of the store. She had narrowed in on a bright pink blazer, the kind you might see an Instagram influencer or a political celebrity wearing at some sort of convention or red carpet event, but not one that anyone like Pam would dream of wearing on a daily basis.

“Pam! You absolutely need this, it’s perfect,” Kennedy added as the two of us approached the vibrant rack and a very excited Aubrey. 

“Yea, it’s cute, but I just don’t think I could ever wear it,” Pam offered. Yes, everything Pam wears nowadays can be categorized as business, professional, formal, or some odd combination of the three, and yes, blazers fit in that category… but bright pink? That offers far too much of a statement. “I could not wear that color to work.”

Aubrey and Kennedy interjected with reassurance that she could wear any color she wanted to, it fit the dress code of the DOE interns, and it would be something different for her. 

But different is an understatement. Pam thinks about the workplace expectations and the image she’s been working so hard to portray around the office: tidy, put together, organized, dependable. How does bright pink affect that? She thinks it would only fan the judgmental flame of the men in the office, make her out to be less serious than she really was about the position and her role among them. Besides, one of her high school classmates had once told her pinks were not her color… something about it clashing too much with her hair and skin tone? Pam doesn’t follow the trends enough to know, but that comment has stuck with her. She shares this with her friends. 

“Don’t be dumb, Pam! You’re so wrong. Whoever said that was probably just jealous that you can pull ANYTHING off. I promise.”

“At least go try it on!”

So, Pam begrudgingly goes to try on the blazer and a white blouse that Kennedy assured would look perfect under it, pulling back the silky green curtains of the dressing room and promising the sweeping employee nearby that she will be quick. 

When she steps out of the dressing room, she has to admit that it does fit her very well. And there is something about the color, too, that just makes her eyes pop. Pam even looks trendy. But, of course, she could still never wear it. 

“I absolutely LOVE it,” shrieks Aubrey, as Kennedy accompanies the compliment with a little round of applause. 

As much as she does agree with them, Pam simply can’t come up with an occasion in which she would justifiably be able to get away with wearing it without harsh criticism, or at the very least some disgusted looks and condescending comments. It doesn’t even match her personality in the slightest. She’s never been very bold or confident, and she certainly has never even considered adopting an individual style, much less a trendy one. Besides, how could she rationalize spending $70 on a blazer that she’ll never remove from the hanger? 

“Guys, it really is cute, but I can’t think of any excuse I’d ever have to wear it, so why don’t either of you buy it?” Pam almost pleads, feeling herself running out of excuses. 

“Because it is literally almost time to go to supper, and you haven’t picked out a single thing. This is cute. Aubrey and I have spent a fortune already. Andddd you look stunning!” This is true, as it is closing time, and Pam is the only member of the trio that has yet to make a personal purchase for the day. And so, she considers the benefits of caving simply as a peace agreement, even a bonding opportunity with these friends that she hasn’t seen in months. She considers for a moment the pros and cons of the situation, and figures being a team player, taking the advice of her friends, keeping them happy with her, and walking out with an (almost neon) pink blazer is better than rejecting their excitement and holding onto this extra $70. 

Sure enough, Pam ends up at the counter, putting her card back into her little gray purse as the cashier bags up her new statement blazer, in all its bright and trendy glory, ready for Pam to take the bag home, steam out the folds, and hang up the blazer for the first and only time it will be hung up in her already too cramped closet. 

But hey, even though Pam can’t imagine an occasion in which she could summon the confidence to attempt to pull off the blazer in a professional setting, at least she owns something trendy. She can now say she owns something trendy. It could be a step in the right direction for her, though she chooses to think of it as more of a new direction. Maybe even just the idea of a new direction.